3 Things I Learned From 2020: The Best and Worst Year of My Life

When I tell people that 2020 was an amazing year for me, they usually laugh and think I am joking. But every once in a while, someone will lean in and whisper, “Me too!” and it brings joy to my heart. We don’t have to continue to validate each other’s misery by denying our own joy. In many ways, it would be easy for me to say that 2020 was also the worst year of my life. If I focused on all the things that I lost, or relationships that were terminated, or the money that never came, I could be depressed and anxious. But, I do not choose this reality for myself; I choose to love myself the way that I would support and love one of you.

Everything is a Blessing or a Lesson

My car was totaled 2 weeks before the lockdowns started. My oldest son had come for a visit and, I tell people, it was like the harshest game of musical chairs; we were locked in together for a year. Who were you with when the music stopped? How did that work out? Yeah, me too. It was rough, and I retreated into my office, and learned to live in a corner of the house, where I meditated and did yoga, in an attempt to work through the energy. Soon after that, my private practice became almost non existent, and I had a lot of time to focus on myself. At first, it was hard, to feel stuck without a car, in a house with someone who had the opposite set of beliefs, but he is my son, and I love him, so I can’t just walk away. We avoided each other for as long as possible, but in the end, I decided it was time to forge ahead, and speak my truth; I mean, nothing could be worse than the awkward greetings and fake smiles.

I began to speak out and up, and the conversations were intense, and I lost my space countless times, but what I learned was the diamond, the shiny coin at the bottom, I learned to be strong in my beliefs, and hold my space, even with men who are invalidating me, one of my core pictures. I am so grateful to him for helping me with this, that the tables have turned, and we are starting to enjoy talking to each other! I can validate myself, no matter what others say, or think, of me. I am learning to apply this new energy principle to my relationships with others, and practicing kindness and compassion in my communications. I have been called to the colors of blue and green a lot lately, so, using the chakra color chart, I am learning to speak my truth from my heart.

Enjoying Being Alone

As long as I can remember, I have been an extrovert. I craved being around other people, and nothing was better than a large group of like minded individuals, focused on the same goal. As I got older, I started to shy away from large crowds, and still enjoyed people, but in smaller groups, more intimate gatherings. One year, I had a New Year’s Eve party, and the house was crammed with people, and it was awesome, but also very overwhelming; that was the last giant party I threw. I became aware of how, every time we interact with someone else, however brief, we exchange energy with them. If you are unaware of this, and how to stop it, or clear it, it will start to manifest as illness and disease in the body. Energy is the thing that keeps us alive, so, when we allow it to be diluted with lower vibrational substances, and situations, we start to feel tired, sick, and sad, to name a few. Over the past few years, I have noticed that I like to spend more and more time by myself. When the lockdowns hit, I was almost glad; this meant I could spend a lot more time alone. That thought rocked me; I suddenly realized that I had broken free of the label, and came back to my true nature, which is a balance between introvert and extrovert. Neither is better than the other, and you can vacillate between the two, from time to time. Labels are the way we create agreements with other people, groups of people, and society.

After a year of lockdowns, I am ready to be around people, and I look forward to the New Earth that we are creating. My vision for the future is coming together, in an Earthbag Community and Retreat Center. IN this community, we will adhere to the Four Agreements Philosophy, and everyone will be encouraged to take as much alone time as they need, but there is also a community available. We will honor each other’s truth, and our own.

Minimalist Living

As I have been living in a corner of my house for the past year, I began to realize that I have entirely too much “stuff”, and space, than I need. I started to feel the need to go through my closets, and gave a lot of things away. I felt the need to clear out and sell some of my larger pieces of furniture, as I prefer sitting on the floor, anyway. I have reduced the amount of food I eat, by about a third, maybe less. I feel I could easily live off the land, if it came to it, and that gives me comfort. The Earth has everything we need, growing on and in it. If we can get back to tuning in to our bodies, and trusting our intuition, we will connect with the great abundance that this planet has to offer. It does not require fancy machines, nice clothes, a large bank balance, or a cupboard stocked full of “food”. It is all offered to you from the Earth, barefoot upon her surface, face to the Sun, with an open heart, and mind. This is the Age of Aquarius, my warriors. Let us rise and meet her!

Abundant Blessings to You All Today!