Andrea Garst

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What is this "being in the flow" business?

As weeks go by, and I continue to find myself in interesting situations, I am struck by the fact that everything can change in the blink of an eye. Someone asked me the other day, "Why are you ok with something one day, then not ok with it the next?" Well, that is what I have begun to realize as being in the flow. Change is the only constant in this universe, and to accept change, and adapt to it, is to be fully immersed in the present moment. Energy shifts, and what you find acceptable can and will change from moment to moment. 

I have accepted that people will be angry with me, and that they will place blame on me, because it is not my truth, and it is not my responsibility. An old friend recently accused me of being overly dramatic, "blowing up his words" in order to create drama. His truth in the situation is that he is refusing to take responsibility for his behavior, and instead of being accountable and conscious of his self-error, he is choosing to make me the problem. I am sorry for him, because he will continue to create these kinds of relationships until he innately accepts that he is creating this reality for himself. I am happy for my own acceptance of his actions, because I am no longer being sucked into his vortex of misery, and I can still send him love without accepting his energetic baton of pain. 

 

Being present for your life is already difficult enough; to be truly grounded in the present, you must be constantly ready for change. You must be willing to relinquish control and sever your egoistic attachment to the outcome. I see frustration in the wayward souls I work with, who deceive themselves into believing, or perhaps hoping, that the present will bring them unending comfort and happiness. Sometimes you'll lose fifty dollars, or you boyfriend will leave you...it is impossible to avoid situations that will bring sadness to your reality. The difficulty lies in accepting all your emotions as true, without allowing them to rule your mind. Joy, and love, are the only constants; to hold on to emotion is to hold on to the past, and to figments of your minds. You have to allow those feelings, of grief, sadness, frustration, even anger, to manifest, and acknowledge it as your own before you can return to the present. Burying feelings, blaming others...the things we do to avoid pain only prolongs those habitual patterns and perpetuates the emotional process, forcing you to stay in those patterns and repeat them in your mind, over and over again. You must love your pain, as much as your pleasure, because you are not defined by emotions that come and go. The Universe will keep giving you the same lesson, until you learn it; it is up to you whether or not you will listen.

If you find yourself constantly surrounded by drama, your lesson is clear. Keeping drama fresh in your mind, focusing on it, wallowing in it; these are all ways to avoid the present by using the mind as a self-damaging weapon. The more you try to analyze your emotions, searching for someone to blame them on, the longer you will continue to attract those emotions, likely from those same people. We all know you cannot directly change others, but you can absolutely create change within yourself.  

When you "shift" your energy, a.k.a. taking your ego out of the equation, there is nothing left for drama to attach itself to. In that moment, you will see your flow start to change, and you will find your presence. That, my friends, is what I am working on right now. I must choose different behavior if I want to see a different result.