Over the past weeks, I have been pondering the meaning of unconditional love. In the last few years of my journey, I have spoken about love, as our originating source, as well as a goal to attain in every area of my life. I thought I knew what love was, but recently, I have come into a whole new understanding of this energy. Love, in the purest sense, is a frequency, an energy where you simply ARE. To BE in love is to BE present and grateful for all that you have been given, and all that you are. This flows naturally into the way you view others, and situations which present themselves.

Today happens to be Christmas Day, and for the first time in many years, I am looking forward to spending time with my family and friends. For many years, I lived in California, divorced and broke, not able to come back to Arkansas; and not really wanting to, in all honesty. My relationship with my family has been a wound for me, a vicious, gaping wound that festered and reopened on a regular basis. I took a 3 year break from all contact; and I was called back when my father was on his deathbed. I am forever grateful to all my soul family who assisted me in reconnecting with my birth family. I was determined to put the past behind me and move forward in love. I was welcomed back with open arms and grateful hearts all around, and my mother and I have actually become close, and it thrills me to realize that I actually enjoy spending time with her. My core belief that “everyone is doing their best” has led me to compassion and deep forgiveness for myself, and all perceived slights, against my younger self. I have delved deeply into my inner child wounds, and shifted out of the victim consciousness that plagued me for so much of my life. I stopped taking things personally and gained a fresh new perspective.

Unconditional love is absent of judgment or expectation. When you judge someone for their actions, and place a label on them, such as “They are mean”, you are reacting to an energy that they are reflecting in you. The same can be said for expectation, as a wise friend once said, “Expectations lead to disappointment”. You are setting yourself, and the other person, up for failure, and this leads to judgment, and places you squarely back into the victim mentality. Next time you feel angry with someone, step back and take a deep breath. Ask yourself if you are reacting to an expectation that you feel they did not meet. Are you judging them, thinking they are purposely doing something to hurt you? Start small, such as when you are driving and someone cuts you off. When you feel that familiar anger flare up, repeat the mantra; they are doing their best. Have you ever unintentionally cut someone off? Have you made mistakes and not understood expectations? Change your perspective and realize that we are all operating from a place of trying to be happy and get our needs met, the best we know how.

I promise you that we are all doing the best we can with the information we have. Find compassion for your fellow humans and you will soon find true unconditional love. I love you all!